First of all, as always, the latest chapter of Loyalty Fallen is up and available to read here. If you haven’t yet started to read Loyalty Fallen, take a look at this short video to learn more.

In the meantime, let’s talk about bad habits, specifically with writing. I recently joined a couple websites where other authors offer critiques of your writing. It was an eye-opening experience as far as pointing out some bad writing habits I didn’t even know I had. Here are three issues I ran into.

Bad writing habit #1: Passive voice

The most common mistake I seem to make is including ‘was’ and ‘were’ in sentences. Using these words often moves sentences into the passive voice instead of the active voice.

As a simple example from the latest chapter of Loyalty Fallen, one sentence in the opening paragraph originally said “They were both squashed and could barely breathe.” This is passive voice, meaning that something is happening to “they” in this sentence, but it’s not clear who is causing that to happen.

I changed it to “The crowd squashed them so they could barely breathe.” Now, not only is the sentence clearer, but it’s more action-oriented. The crowd is doing the action of squashing.

As another example, you’ve probably read something like this sentence in a book before: “His face was burned into her memory.” You can rewrite this to move it into the active voice while also being able to further describe the face and why she would remember it forever. “The distinctive scarring on his features burned his face into her memory.” Or to make it even more simple, “His face burned itself into her memory.”

Passive voice isn’t necessarily an awful thing. Many writers use it. However, most editors I’ve worked with consider it a liability that you shouldn’t use all that often.

Bad writing habit #2: Overusing words

I tend to either overuse words or use them too close to one another. For example, Ashbranded originally relied far too heavily on the word “ash,” as you might expect. Because I wanted ash to be a big part of the world building, I thought that was inescapable.

Thanks to folks who critiqued my writing, I began to find there were plenty of other alternatives I could use, like embers, cinders, or soot. In some cases, I eliminated it altogether.

As another example, I frequently use “However” to start paragraphs. If two paragraphs in succession start with “however,” readers will begin to notice. I also find myself using the same adjective in consecutive sentences. If you say “The glow from the torch,” then in the next sentence, “The glowing mushrooms that lined the cave,” it’s time to pick up a synonym dictionary. Or you could just use Google like everyone else does.

Bad writing habit #3: Overusing “time” words

These might include words like:

• Then
• Next
• After that
• Suddenly

Each of these words indicates time, but there’s a problem with the first three in particular.

The reader already assumes that your next paragraph is taking place after the last one in time. So using phrases like “Then he left” is unnecessary. You can just say “He left” instead.

I’ve also noticed that in action sequences I often use “suddenly” to start off the action or show a change in the action. Most editors and experienced critiquers seem to agree the word is unnecessary in most cases.

Here’s another example from the current chapter: “Ren suddenly realized the cheering was dying down. All eyes had turned to King Tarik.” These two sentences should be: “The cheering died down. All eyes turned to King Tarik.” The shorter sentences do the job just fine, without any added fluff.

Fixing bad habits

When I realized how often I made these mistakes, I started to feel discouraged. Rewriting to fix all of it seemed challenging at best. Still, I’m very confident that my skills will improve as I continue to be more critical of my own writing going forward.

Here are a couple steps you can take in the same direction.

1. Use CTRL + F or CMD + F to find words. Search for “was and were” and just see how many times they pop up in your chapters. Are you seeing them all over the place? Does a particular adjective show up in multiple consecutive sentences? Are you using “suddenly” or “then” to move the action along?
2. Post your works for critique on sites like Scribophile and Critique Circle. These sites work on a give-to-get basis, which means you’ll need to critique other peoples’ work as well. If you’re not confident in your ability to do that, just give your honest opinion as a reader.
3. Study writing best practices. Active voice is generally considered a best practice for writing in various genres and styles. Learn how to use it effectively and avoid passive voice.

Final thoughts

Like any other career or hobby, writing takes work and focus. So when you’re deciding how you want to set your writing goals this year, start by fixing your bad habits.